A friend of mine told me something outrageous the other day. It is so outrageous… and yet so common.
So, as she calls it, a pretty average crappy club near where she lives (in Reigate), refused entry to a girl. This girl wasn’t smashed, she wasn’t ‘inappropriately’ dressed, she wasn’t rude to the bouncer and she wasn’t underage. The normal reasons people are generally refused entry into clubs.
She was too fat.
What makes me sad is that hearing stories like that doesn’t shock me anymore. Especially now, having been out in London a few times, and being pre-warned I have to dress a certain way, otherwise I’d be turned away at the door.
She was a size 10. A. SIZE. TEN.
In what way, shape of form is a size 10 fat?!?!??!?!!?
I love a good club night – multiple g&t’s alongside a good cheesy dance room with the usual awful and embarrassing cheesy dancing that always follows is my idea of a top night. I’ve had these when I’ve been dressed up to the nines and I’ve had these after a 12 hour shift in a restaurant so I end up in the club dressed in my work tee and trainers. Looking a right state basically.
What angers me about this is that I’ve heard multiple stories from my friend about this club – it’s nothing special. It sounds like your average small town club and in no way a one of the high-end London clubs who are notoriously known for turning people away for not having the ‘right look’.
Also, when you do make an effort to look good for a night out, I feel this is when girls might feel most self conscious about yourself. I know that I do! If I’m wearing something slim fitting or revealing of course I’m going to feel slightly more exposed and therefore slightly more anxious about how I look.
I can imagine that this ‘fat’ girl was getting ready with her other ‘fat’ friends, pre-drinking, playing a few games and looking forward to a night out somewhere she’s probably been a few times. Little did she know she’d be turned away for her weight?
Theres been a few articles surrounding this subject and the girl in question previously suffered from an eating disorder.
She mentioned in a recent interview that this highlights a much larger problem in society – discrimination against size. No one, ever, should ever be discriminated for the size of their body.
Nobody, unless told, has any idea why that person may have been through, or may be going through that could be having an effect on their weight. It’s a disgusting but common problem in this day and age and when incidents like this happen it just makes me question why nothing more substantial is being done to stop it. Discrimination like this, while it may seem small at first may lead, and has lead, to far more serious mental illnesses that have the power to completely take over and change a person for the worse.
This girl wanted a night out with her friends. She didn’t need a random doorman telling her she wasn’t the right dress size. Who is he to determine the what dress size is ‘right’ anyway!? He doesn’t. As a matter of fact, no one does. If that person feels happy and healthy within themselves, regardless of what the scales say, then, to themselves, they’re ‘right’.
This is classic club routine though… and its utterly ridiculous. The fact that men also have to pay when women get into a lot of places completely free of charge grinds my gears and makes me sad that while so many women and men are fighting so hard for equality and simple mundane things such as the price of a club entry still aren’t fair for both genders.
I’m just baffled by the fact that it’s nearly the end of 2016 and shit like this is still happening. 2016 has been an odd year. And it’s only going to get odder I reckon.
Working in the fashion industry and having come to terms with the fact that gorgeous PHOTOSHOPPED models are plastered across every advertising platform possible – I’ve sort of become immune to it. I know that to achieve the model look is impossible, because it was never real in the first place. But when girls who are so unhappy with how they look see these adverts of course it’s going to have a negative effect on them. Their thoughts just instantly shoot to the classic ‘to be beautiful and the ‘perfect’ shape I MUST look like this model’… these thoughts sometimes lead to detrimental actions and unrealistic ‘goals’.
I just hope that in a years time, I look back on this blog post and the world is different. I hope that people are more accepting, more kind and less afraid to not give a damn about what others think of them. I hope this for myself too. Everyone is guilty for being worried about how others perceive them – and if you can’t admit it then your just kidding yourself.
I hope that women and men can walk around and not be afraid of being made to feel small or insignificant by someone else.
I just hope that change is around the corner, because we really need it. And fast.
Peace and love xxx
(I’m hoping to do a series of blogs all about female empowerment and gender equality… so if that sounds like something you’d like to read (go onnnnn) check back in a week or so when I may or may have got myself sorted and starting posting regularly again!)